Emetophobia in Kids and Teens: Tips for Parents
If you are a parent to a child with emetophobia, it means they have an intense fear of vomiting. When a child is afraid of throwing up, it can be challenging to know how to support them. They may struggle with situations that may seem silly to others, and it can be difficult to help your child manage these worries. Here are some tips that you can use to help your child face their fears about throwing up.
Externalize the anxiety - In many cases it can help to externalize the anxiety to help the child remember that it is separate from themselves. Younger children may enjoy naming and drawing an anxiety character or villain - for example “The Worry Monster” or “Dr. Danger” or even just “Bob.” Older teens may also find it helpful to use externalizing language to label their anxiety. You can use this in conversations to identify situations where your child may want to “boss back” the anxiety instead of giving in.
For example: It sounds like even though you want to go on the field trip tomorrow, Dr. Danger is telling you it's too risky to go on the bus with the other kids. But do you think it’s possible Dr. Danger is trying to trick you, and it’s actually okay to go? Let’s practice bossing him back together.
Validate your child’s anxiety - When your child is overwhelmed, express empathy for their emotions. Although your child’s fears may seem irrational to you, put yourself in their shoes and try to understand where they are coming from. No one likes to hear their fears are “silly,” and if you tell them a situation is “no big deal” you may accidentally send this message and invalidate their emotions. Instead, try telling them that you can see why a situation might be difficult, and express confidence in their ability to handle it.
For example: I know there are a lot of kids sleeping in your bunk at camp. It makes sense that your worries about someone being sick would be extra high. Even though it's hard, I know you can do it!
Help your child practice gradually - When a child’s emetophobia is making them avoid situations, that avoidance only makes the anxiety grow stronger over time. You can help your child face their fears by breaking down difficult situations into smaller, more manageable steps. By practicing these challenges, your child will learn that some of their fears may not come true, and that no matter what happens they are brave enough to handle it. Some kids and teens may need a reward to motivate them to participate, while others will be motivated on their own. Either way, the key is lots of practice to build their confidence.
For example: It sounds like playing with Emma is making you nervous, ever since she threw up last week. It's so mean that Dr. Danger is trying to keep you away from your friend, when I know you really like playing with her. How about we start by saying hi when we see her outside, and then once you are comfortable with that we will stop by for a short conversation. We can keep practicing step by step until you are ready to play together again.
Limit accommodations - When a child has anxiety, most parents find they have gotten roped into participating in the avoidance. The word for this is “accommodation” and it's very common. It’s understandable that you want to find ways to reduce your child’s distress, and sometimes giving in feels like it's the only option. However, just like all avoidance, this only works in the short-term, and actually increases the anxiety in the long-run. Examples of parental accommodation are picking a child up early, allowing them to skip an activity, providing different food, and changing your own plans in response to your child’s anxiety. Just like any other avoidance, accommodation can be targeted through challenges. When done gradually in a supportive manner, this can help kids build their confidence in managing their own emetophobia independently.
One of the most common examples of accommodation is providing lots of reassurance: answering repeated questions about whether a child is likely to throw up, if food is safe, if someone else is ill, and more. These worry questions often run on repeat, and while answering them provides brief relief, it never lasts for long! Strategies such as gradually reducing how often you answer questions, putting specific questions on the “do not ask list,” or waiting 5 minutes to answer a worry question can all help your child learn how to manage their own anxiety.
For example: It sounds like Dr. Danger is making you wonder again about whether this food is safe to eat. I don’t take questions from Dr. Danger, and I know you know the answer, so I’m not going to answer this a second time.
Seek treatment if needed - If you’ve tried these strategies without success, or can’t figure out where to begin, you may need some additional assistance. Therapy can be very beneficial in helping kids and their parents learn strategies to cope with emetophobia. Look for a therapist who specializes in CBT or ERP for emetophobia in kids - you don’t have to do this alone.
Ready to start your child’s recovery?
CABT's Emetophobia Institute and expert therapists specialize in ERP therapy for patients of all ages. Many of our clinicians are child psychologists with extensive experience treating emetophobia in kids. Book a free 15-minute intake call today.
